Can I "Find" Love

Can I "find" love? It seems like everyone has an opinion on how to do it. "Stop looking" "do more of this" "do less of that" "stop doing that" "open up" "don't be so open". These are all part of the rules of dating. I have to say I feel like I've tried them all and yet here I am. 28. Single. I've been single for almost 6 years. I have dated probably a magillion guys within the last 6 years and have come out curled up in bed alone on a Saturday night eating brie and bacon on crackers watching Jersey Shore followed by ANTM on line with my cat happily and routinely sleeping at my feet.

I don't know what it is about being 28 but I feel like I'm ready. I'm really ready to find "the one". How do I know I'm really ready? Like any American knows, money talks. I've spent money to do it - well not "do it" but to find love. I am now on eharmony. I'm going to say that part of being successful in love is screening heavily, or being more "choosey." I need all the help I can get with that because my picker is obviously broken. This blog could have started 6 years ago with the plethora of bad dating experiences I've had, but it would have been called "emotionally damaged, self loathing, no compromise, I hate men" Hardly a focus for love. Last year I was in a 3 month relationship (albeit long distance) where marriage was discussed and ring shopping ensued....and then we broke up. I think that was a teaser for me, testing me to see what is it exactly that I want.

This I know for sure : I want love. I want someone to love and have them love me back. I want a best friend and partner and someone who makes me laugh all the time...even when I hate them. Someone I can respect and someone that inspires me to be a better me by simply loving me the way I am. After reading a few books on dating and watching 3 seasons of Tough Love by Steve Ward it seems like finding love is possible. A little bit of humility and mental health and bada-boom bada-bing man and wife. I've been babystepping my way to the pool and the water is finally starting to look warm.

I've always thought when I was 28 I would be ready to get married. Well here it is. Lets see if I can find love.